Sometimes love looks a lot like trouble

Another school year is done and what a year it has been! Every year my students teach me so much, and the end of the school year brings a flood of things to me.

First, it reminds me that I am inching towards that decade teaching line while immediately recalling that very first classroom of my own that I stepped into; I can remember the kids, the nerves, and the amazing end. Though more than a little cliché, every student truly does touch you as a teacher and helps to form you as a teacher.  As I watched many of our students officially walk out the door for the last time, I was reminded what each one taught me and here are the highlights; just because it worked one year doesn’t mean that it will this year, all kids can reach to bar even if it seems “too high”, sometimes love looks a lot like trouble, balance is precious in all aspects of life, keep evolving, extended patience, it is never too late, do something unexpected and a bit childish, never forget your flexibility, and never stop trying.

Next, it reminds me of all of the teachers that have helped shape me; from the kindergarten teacher who said I needed improvement my first quarter in school to my elementary teachers that wanted me to skip grades along the way to my middle school teachers who are honestly kind of a blur (ironic considering that I teach middle school) to my high school teachers who allowed me to blossom to my college professors who helped me set foot in my classroom and to all of the amazing teachers, and many whom I now call friend, that have helped shape my career, and my soul, along the way. I would not be where I am today without so many of those wonderful teachers but the ones who became my coworkers and friends are the backbone of so much that I do, and I will take a few moments to honor them now. From my very first wonderful mentor who was classy and sassy and helped me get a foot in the door at an absolutely amazing place (where I would be blessed with more than I can ever explain), to the woman who scared the ever loving hell out of me but would go on to not only teach me about life, humility, leadership, positive energy, teaching, students, and family but who would also become someone who holds a special place in my soul to a perfect match who went on a crazy journey with me for over a year to try and continue filling so many gaps for our kiddos and would introduce me to the wonderful world of white wine to a team that was joyful, flexible, a little OCD, charismatic, compassionate, and absolutely amazing and taught me the pleasures of co-teaching to a move that brought me a very different perspective and had me questioning staying in the profession to my most present team where my stay was to be only a year but my welcome was (mostly…hehe) extended, and I am excitedly moving into year three even if I will have 4 preps! My present team is a wonderfully eclectic mix where I have one and a half feet in special education and the other foot in general education. This staff has helped to alter my perspective for a very new task and challenge and has supported me along the way; from a principal and assistant principal are comfortable like your favorite pair of jeans – you can always count on them, they will support and listen to you, but they may challenge you just a little to button that button to a woman’s whose job I place held (and who I am forever grateful for helping me enter such a wonderful opportunity even if it was unintentional) and makes it all seem a bit too easy in the many roles that she takes on to a mentor who was supportive, listened to the craziness, and helped get me through a crazy transitional year all with serious grace and humor and who I miss seeing on a regular basis to an intervention team who couldn’t be more unique and more influential on me as a teacher and a person as they are free natured, loving, compassionate, tenured, emotional, and persistent in the pursuit of doing all things right for all kids to a building of phenomenal teachers and support staff that are in the midst of changes and challenges upbeat, willing to take whatever course gets students to press beyond those imaginary boundaries, fun loving, and determined. As a teacher I couldn't have asked for a better second home that I didn't realize I was seeking and, if you believe in that sort of thing, fate made sure that I made that crazy one year only interview drive “so far” outside of the city so that I could find so many pieces that my soul apparently needed at the time and continues to thrive off of on a regular basis.  

Lastly, (and really because this is becoming a novella) it reminds me of the work I have ahead of me. Most importantly, how can I change/improve/adapt to make me even better in this coming year! If you are not constantly evolving as a teacher and consider yourself in the “exceeds expectations” category in everything you do, then you are doing it wrong. It is only with constant changes/improvements/ adaptations that you can continue to be an amazing teacher with a grasp on reality that we can’t to the same thing year-to-year and expect our kiddos to flourish with us. Next, it reminds me of all the planning that I want to get done this summer to be not only prepared but to be sure that I am consistently improving as many aspects of my lessons at a time. Finally, it makes me think of the end of the next school year with the students that I will have had for almost three years (and two in many other cases), will I have done enough and how can I make sure that the answer is yes?